Trying to find ways to taper off my Ativan and go onto an anti-depressant was the goal my Doctor and I had set. But this was very difficult. The first taper was unbearable...by day four I was having constant severe panic attacks and was trembling, had lost my appetite and was exhibiting all the symptoms I had had that led me to the hospital in the first place. I felt a pressure in my head and like I was going to lose control of my body. I immediately went back onto my full dose of Ativan again. I tried Zoloft but only on a 12.5 ml dose a day because my Dr. and I realized I was highly sensitive to any change. This was to raise the Serotonin levels in my brain in order to withdraw from my Ativan with less withdrawals. However...I was aggressive one moment and emotionally depressed and crying the next. When I hit the suicidal stage I was taken off of it immediately. My next option was Prozac. He said we could keep trying different meds until we found one that worked for me. This meant, you will suffer until you find one that works for you. I opted for the option of going up on my Trileptal and then down on my Ativan. Since going up on the Trileptal caused withdrawal symptoms I realized my options of going up or down and getting off were slim to none. After one more miserable try of withdrawing from the Ativan I gave up. In desperation I pleaded for God to help me find a solution to my problem. After this prayer I felt like I should go online and search under Ativan withdrawals. This same day I found Point of Return. I cried for joy knowing I had found the answer to my prayer. I felt hope for the first time since I started my meds.
I started my Point of Return program at the end of May 2009. After a two week adjustment period I began to feel energy flow back into my body. Since I had reached a tolerance level and did not want to go up on my Ativan I had felt weak and more anxious. With POR I could do more and felt like it was making up for the difference that my medications could not (unless I went up). I enjoyed a greater freedom from agoraphobia and could drive more freely and more often at greater distances.
What is Point of Return? It is four whole food supplements that gives your body what it needs most. 1) Glutithion is the body's #1 needed antioxidant and it feeds every part of the brain and body. My body was highly depleted of this wonderful food that helps my body detoxify and re balance my brain chemistry. It SUPPORTS my body and helps my immune system 2) fish oil; highly concentrated and of the purist form, another necessary brain food that helps my MOOD 3) Melatonin made from tart cherries which stimulates natural melatonin and serotonin production. This helps me to SLEEP better. 4) RELAX is a food that helps me to relax and does not interfere with my Ativan. I can take it as much as I need to relax and help me to sleep. None of these supplements interfere with my medications and they give me the support I need to balance out so my body can heal itself.
Things I have noticed since I started taking this;
More energy
Weight loss
Less Anxiety
Heart is calm and regulated
Streanth
Better sleep
No painful withdrawals from Ativan taper
Week one of Ativan Taper:
The first two days I needed to go up on some products to make my taper more comfortable. The POR staff helped me to make the necessary adjustments. This week I chalked it up as a learning experience that was positive. I'm withdrawing 5% per week with the help of a compounding pharmacy and am amazed at how well I feel. I have hit a few minor snags that like I said were taken care of by a kind and loving support group at POR. I love their motto, if you are feeling bad then you are doing something wrong! I think in regards to illness this can be said Universally...when we get sick it's our bodies way of telling us, you are doing something wrong here it's time to make some changes. With point of return, it's add this, tweak that and vwala RELIEF!!!!!!!! I love it! I feel like I've discovered a Gold Mine but I don't want to keep it a secret! Until next week!
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